Redlight Bites: G's German
I am a Patpong professional. A redlight rascal. A nightlife nut. A gogo Godzilla, a bar beast. A pole kitty pundit. A virtuoso of vice. A cathouse connoisseur. I spend an inordinate amount of my free time (nearly 100%) in Bangkok’s adult nightlife entertainment zones—mostly Patpong—and that means I’m often there at mealtime. One of my fave dining destinations in proximity to Patpong is G’s German restaurant in Silom. It’s not in Patpong, per se, but it’s close enough—a 30-meter walk from the south end of Soi 2. If you’ve never tried it, allow me to paint a picture for you…
G’s menu is extensive. There’s a ton of stuff I’ve never tried—from soups to salads to sausage and a bunch of traditional German fare—so my review won’t come close to doing G’s justice. But the menu items I’ve tried are ones I order frequently, because they’re simply awesome.
Jaeger Schnitzel
It comes as a battered ‘n fried slab of chicken or pork. I prefer pork. Home-made schnitz smothered in mushroom gravy. Gotta get sauerkraut and spaetzle as the two side orders. The plate is humongous, and on Thursdays all schnitz’s are 40% off. G’s is the best I’ve had outside of Germany. In fact, every time I eat it I get flashbacks to the summer I spent in Heidelberg when I was 17.
Fleischpflanzerl
It’s a fancy way of saying “mini beef patties” with a bit more to it. Three medallions of ground beef with spices mixed in and a side of pommes frittes and curry sauce. Delicious, hot, filling comfort food.
Sauerkraut Pfannchen
This is a perfect snack for anyone who 1—doesn’t want a huge meal and/or 2—is on keto. Three sausages in a hot pan alongside a generous helping of kraut. Personally I prefer to order this delivered to my seat in XXX Lounge. That way, I get dinner and a show (incidentally, all of G’s dishes are available for delivery to XXX).
Flammkuchen
This is Germany’s answer to flatbread pizza with feta instead of mozzarella. G’s has two kinds—bacon and onion or vegetarian (olives and chilis). I always opt for the bacon. It’s a fun snack, and if you’re alone, filling enough to have as a meal.
Frittierter Camembert
Fried camembert cheese, lingenberry jam, slices of bread. And a wedge of pineapple for good measure. It pairs perfectly with a glass of kriek lambic. This is one of those dishes where, when I’m eating it, I feel like I’ve tricked someone into treating me like I’m high class.
Thai Fusion: Red and Green Curry Wurst
Guido, the owner, has done a pretty awesome job of creating what he calls ‘crossover’ dishes—Thai food fused with German meat. The two I’ve tried are the red and green (kiow wan) curries. The red is hot—and I mean “furnace for your tastebuds” hot. If you’re into spicy, the curry and German sausage make for a symbiotic duo, and when you throw in a cold thirst quencher like Flensburger. The green curry is positively succulent. I remember scraping the last drops off the bottom of the bowl, wishing there was more. It achieves a perfect balance of exotic Thai flavors and savory, rich German wurst. I give it a 10 out of 10.
Thai Fare
Then there’s G’s just straight-up Thai food. I’m fond of having these traditional dishes delivered to my seat at XXX Lounge, because I know the girls will dig in, and I’m happy to share. I’m partial to the shrimp cakes, moo dat deow, chicken satay, and spring rolls.
Kaiserschmarrn
The closest thing we have to this dessert in the US is a funnel cake. It’s bread—like a cross between a pancake and a churro—covered in rum raisin sauce, powdered sugar, whipped cream, chocolate, and cherries and yes, it’s as decadent and sweet as it sounds.
And I haven’t even gotten to the beers. In order to do their beer menu justice, that’ll have to be a separate post. I hope this sparked your interest, especially if you’ve been craving great German food whilst mid-Thai Odyssey, whether temporary or permanent…may your stay be full of wonder and flavor. Cheers, folks.